From amateur to professional...: i'm always the student....

Hi everyone:

well guys i know i've seen better days, but I think things are getting worse. this week was a long week, and as i sit here on SUPERBOWL SUNDAY(lame) i hope that things will turn up soon.

the money at work is basically non-existent and i leave after every shift wondering how i got here. how i ended up in this place in my life where my bills consume me... it's like if i decide to take a day off, i know for a fact by doing this it will hurt my pockets. i hate my f**king job, actually i hate every thing that i do that doesn't involve photography.

i'm so exhausted with every thing right now. there's no breaks, it's either: deal with this, do that, my money issues, my lack of happiness, or my infinite karma. even though most of these things are only issues because of something i did or didn't do, i still WANT A BREAK!!! i hope for some mercy and pray for some sun in my cloudy life....

anyways, i feel like i had a very productive week. it started with me meeting up with my lawyer to put some finishing touches on my joint custody battle with my little girl. She is my world, and it was only money that was holding me back from seeing her so i finally took care of it. i should hear something back by next week and then it's time to go to court which is something that i dread and am not looking forward to.

on another note, this week i also took down my art show after it's long month of speculation. i was initially pleased with its beginning and its end. i didn't do as well financially as i thought i would but as a whole i made a name for myself. it was a lesson in life and business and i realized i have a lot to learn. i was pleased that i met so many new faces that i didn't think i would have ever met if i hadn't had that show. all month friends of mine have been introducing me to people who admire my work as well as the show. everyone was intrigued by the idea of secrets. this is why i think i have something valid. Now lies the future for "Someone must know..." someone gave me the idea of publishing a book, and even gave me a website that helps create your own masterpiece. i took this idea as a blessing. it's a chance to show the theme and also a chance to show that i am also an congenial photographer with promise. i hope this book is a success. pictures can get expensive, but if you can get a book with all of the pictures that you like for a third of the price, then i think you found a deal. it's a 80 page book filled with nothing but photo's for your coffee tables and your enjoyment. it's going to sell for a whopping $49.99 and will be available on February 23rd.

i also had my first class in strobe lighting this week. My amazing friend, Leonard Lopp (www.oneshotremedy.com) took me out for a hands-on shoot. i was actually the subject he was shooting but he has experience with strobe and flash photography and he explained every detail. i was completely ignorant to this type of photography until he started to make it make sense. i am a trained film and ambient light photographer, so this was a bit of struggle for me. i've had classes in lighting before but my professors never actually explained how it really worked in different situations. he is a very knowledgeable source for my future and i am grateful for his time and friendship. he is a professor in the making!!! lol

i took what i learned and put it to use this weekend when my girlfriend, her little boy Aden, and i went on the streetcar to Audubon Park. Aden loves trains, i mean he is obsessed with trains so when he comes to visit i try to take him for a ride. i thought this would be a perfect opportunity to try out my new skills at the park. i've realized how lazy i've become with my digital camera. i always set the camera on auto and begin shooting just to get that quick photo. now with my new found knowledge my laziness ends and it's back to the old film way with a digital image. With digital i totally forgot about my beautiful friends Aperture and Shutter Speed. i told you i became lazy.... i have a Nikon D50 so i'm limited to all of the new technology offered these days but in life you figure out how to make best of what you've got. as i shot and adjusted my two friends the pictures came out flawless. i didn't think digital could look this good and as i was really getting in to it, i forgot i was with company. i felt like i was 3 years old again playing with a new toy. i'm so inspired right now that all i want to do is take every free minute to go shoot. although isn't that how it should be???...

wkt

here's a few shoots that Leonard took